Hey Papa! Father’s day is near. People are already preparing.. Promotions are already being thought about; gift suggestions are already being displayed..have you ever look forward for this day? I wonder. Did it ever occurred to you how special this day is? or it is just another normal day? I suppose the latter.
Hey Papa! Did you ever wish your daughter would call you some day and greet you ” Happy Father’s Day!” ? or maybe surprise you with a gift beside your bed, maybe its your favorite branded clothes, or car parts, or a subscription to a club, or maybe just take you out on a dinner? Did you Papa? or you never wished because you forgot that you even have a daughter? I suppose the latter.
Hey Papa! Did you ever feel envious? When your friends go on family trips together.,eat out together with the whole family..so complete..a mother, a father and their children? or you never feel any because you never want a complete family? I suppose the latter.
Hey Papa! Did you remember the first and last words you said to your daughter? How she initiated the conversation because you were too conceited and coward to speak to her? Did you papa? Maybe not! Because for you it was just another ordinary night. Just you making a conversation. Just you, granting the pleading request of your 18 year old daughter, for you to see eye to eye, talk heart to heart, for the first time in her 18 fucking years of existence! Which one Papa? I suppose the latter.
Well Papa, I wanted to tell you a lot of things. Ask a lot of questions. Clarify a lot of issues..but you are not ready for it,or never will be. However Papa, I want to greet you Happy Fathers Day! even if you do not deserve it.
Still, I wanted to tell you my sincerest THANK YOU! Thank you Papa! Thank you for breaking my heart before I was even born. More so, for tearing my Mama’s heart into pieces. You have made her,me, us stronger than we will ever be. Your absence taught me that not all men are strong enough to stand on their own feet. Some just plant seed and leave when the seed starts to sprout because it would mean responsibility.
Your absence taught me that not all men are strong enough to stand on their own feet. Some just plant seed and leave when the seed starts to sprout because it would mean responsibility.
Thank you for teaching me that I should be responsible for myself,for my decisions, for my actions. To accept my mistakes, learn from it and rise above. If not for you Papa, I will be dependent enough to your strengths or of other peoples’. If its not you Papa, I will not be this strong, because I gain what you lack.
I learnt to fight back the abuse of other men like you, who think women are just women. Inferior and exists only to please men. I learnt to speak up my rights and say no as an answer, things you can never do Papa, words you can never utter. I learned to protect Mama, to protect myself,and understand that even if sometimes we are weak, I can still stand up because who else will do? Its just us Papa, you weren’t there.
I learned to fight, fight until I have the strength to…
I learned when to speak and when not to..
and to show the world that no one’s actions and mistakes can ever define me and who I want to be! Not even you Papa, not even.
Thank you for that Papa.
I am genuinely grateful for that! Somewhat grateful that even if I do not have the will to choose a parent, you were given to me, because I will not be me if its not for you.
So for what its worth,
I genuinely greet you..
HAPPY FATHER’s DAY!!
_- from the best daughter you will ever have.
(or the only daughter you have)